This question “RINGS” a bell (Don’t get the pun? You will!)
Today’s Father Knows Best? question comes from The Gibs, a man I’d like to work with someday. He asks this:
I checked online, and I haven’t found any credible olympic games held for babies. If you were to find one, though, what events do you think Chandler would be competing in?
Thanks for your question, The Gibs! First of all I have to ask, in your internet research did you happen to stumble across the post I wrote back during the Winter Olympics where I talked about what Olympic sports Chandler could compete in? Because that…well…that kind of answers your question, now doesn’t it? It’s okay. Not everyone can be good at internet research. It’s not like it’s your job or anything.
But that post was talking about what adult sports Chandler will compete in for the next Winter Olympics in 2014. (I’m serious) But your question was about Olympic games for babies. Not just any Olympic games. Credible Olympic games.
I’m curious, The Gibs. You said you didn’t find any credible Olympic games for babies. Did you find some non-credible Olympic games for babies? What kind of crazy games did you find? Here’s a list of the not so credible games I imagine you found.
- Baby shot put: A game where fathers toss their babies as far as they can.
- Greco Roman Baby Wrestling: Two babies wrestle on a mat until one pins the other and the other learns how to say the word “Uncle!”
- The Baby Luge: The fuller the diaper the faster they go!
- Cross Country Piing: Their parents ski cross country while holding the baby out as he/she pees, leaving a trail of yellow snow. The longest trail wins. Major point deductions for brown snow.
- Baby Fencing: Two Babies. Two Fencing Foils. Thousands of tears.
Is that what you found?
Since the last time I wrote about Chandler’s Olympic prospects he has gained a lot of new skills. Probably the most athletic skill he has gained in that time is his ability to climb and hang on to things. Check out this picture.
Look at that! He’s hanging from the side of that crib all by himself and even using his feet to climb up higher! And he wasn’t just hanging there for a few seconds. He was there for over a minute before he let himself down. Amazing.
Hmm…what Olympic sport involves hanging from something? The Rings! And now to convert it to a baby Olympic sport, we’ll make it the Teething Rings.
The Teething Rings: A sport where babies see how long they can dangle by their mouth and hands from a teething ring that is hanging 5 feet off the ground. Last baby to fall wins. Extra points for actually growing a tooth while you are hanging.
There! Question answered! Who’s next?
