The Early Bird gets on my nerves

We had a good thing going. I don’t know what happened. We got to the point where Chandler would consistently sleep almost all the way through the night with only 2 regular feedings. Then he’d wake up at the considerate hour of 7am. In fact I was even able to stretch it to 7:30 or 7:45.

But for almost a week now Chandler has decided there are just not enough hours in the day to get all his work done and he needs to start getting up earlier. So now he has started waking up at 6am or sometimes even (gasp) 5:30! Now I know a lot of you die-hard (aka less fortunate) parents who have babies that wake up that early or earlier all the time are probably thinking something like, “Suck it up funny man!” Or maybe, “Hey why don’t you start improvising fatherhood instead of compromising fatherhood!”

I’m not really sure what that second one means, to be honest. But it had some nice alliteration in there and you know what I say…A little alliteration helps a non-sense insult go a long way. 

Anyway…the point is, Chandler is waking up earlier and it’s bugging the heck out of me. My wife and I thought we had made so much progress. Just the other night we were commenting on how well he was sleeping. My wife even gave me all the credit for this success. I was feeling pretty good about that until I realized that basically what she was saying was, “You did a great job of ignoring your child as he cried all night long. You are really skilled at sleeping through your child’s screams of agony.”

This is true, though. Anytime there is a parenting technique that requires me to ignore my child, I’ve got that down! If ignorance is bliss, then I have the potential to be the most blissful father of all time. 

Okay, that’s not entirely true. I’ve stopped writing this post 5 times so far to stare at my son as he plays in his jumperoo. But right now he’s in a good and playful mood. If he was crying, I could stick him in a closet and get some work done while he gets it out of his system. (These are jokes people, put down that number for the abuse hotline….besides I give him toys when he’s in the closet.)

What was I talking about? Oh yes. Mornings. Early. Bleh. The only thing good about being up in the morning is Egg McMuffins. Does McDonald’s deliver?