Is there a Dr. Phil in the house?

It’s time for another edition of Father Knows Best? My mailbox is getting a little backed up and if you’ve submitted a question recently, don’t worry I will answer it soon! Today’s question comes from an anonymous mommy…an anonymommy.

I’m a 20 year-old mother of an 11-month old. Things didn’t work out between my baby daddy and I, and I’ve been seeing a guy on the weekends for the past few months, and he knows/gets along well with my child. However, I always take responsibility for her (diapers/feeding etc) and he feels ready to fill in the missing daddy role, whats the best way to ease him into this?

This is a great question Anonymommy. Easing New Daddy into his role is very important. Just like riding a bike you want to start New Daddy off with some training wheels. If you want to have New Daddy take over on some of the responsibilities throw him a few softballs before you give him a curveball. If you give him a diaper to change don’t give him a poop bomb on his first try. If you’re going to let him feed your daughter, let him use a bottle a few times and then let him work his way up to breast feeding. 

It’s important to ease him into his new role, but New Daddy isn’t the only person who will need some time to get used to this new arrangement. Both you and your baby will also need to be comfortable with New Daddy’s presence. While your daughter might get along great with New Daddy when she is feeling playful, it’s when she is upset and vulnerable that she’ll have the hardest time accepting him.

More importantly, as you’ve been a single mother for 11 months you’ll have to get used to the idea of sharing the role of parent. The hardest part here will be that you know exactly how you want everything done, and New Daddy might not be on the same page. So communicate with him as much as you can. But also every now and then take a step back and let him do it his way. Gradually give him more and more room to operate and create his own parenting style. Just make sure his parenting style doesn’t look anything like Michael Jackson or Britney Spears. 

Wow, just like Dr. Phil I have no idea what I’m talking about, but it sure sounds good.