Daddy’s Day at the Dentist
The other day I went to the dentist for the first time in…let’s see…oh well at least five years because I know I haven’t been to the dentist since I moved here. And I didn’t go to the dentist at all during my time in college so…it’s been well over a decade. In fact the last time I went to the dentist they gave me a toy afterwards. I was a little disappointed this time when no toys were offered. After all, I had been a good boy the throughout the entire appointment.
I went in for a routine cleaning. I ended up meeting with three people. I’ll simply call them Dentist Lady, X-Ray Lady, and Dentist Man. Dentist Lady took one look at my teeth and informed me there would be nothing routine about this cleaning. She told me we were going to need to do a “deep clean” and for that she was going to need to numb my mouth. With needles. Awesome.
I’ve actually never had this done before and to be honest I’ve never been all that scared of needles. It is weird however to think about the idea of a needle getting poked into your gums. But they do everything they can to make you feel comfortable. The dentist chair I was sitting in was actually a massage chair. Two little nubs were gently pressing into my upper back in an alternating rotation. This felt nice but I worried that this was making me a moving target. Even more so I was worried that the chair would suddenly go into its “fists of fury” mode right as Dentist Lady had something sharp in my mouth. Luckily the chair was heavily sedated and soon so was the right side of my mouth.
Dentist Lady then proceeded to blast away a decade’s worth of plaque. You see, I like to have an ice cold Mt. Dew every now and then. And by “every now and then” I mean literally EVERY NOW, and then I have one waiting for when I’m done. Typing that sentence actually made me get up and get one from the fridge. I don’t think you are fully getting the picture. Yesterday I saw on a health food show a lady said “I will usually have a diet soda at least one every day!” as if that was a lot. I just had to laugh. A 36 pack will last me 4 days. That’s 9 a day. 108 ounces each day. On average.
Okay, now multiply that by a decade. No matter how good I am at brushing my teeth, they were bound to be a little…plaquey.
The whole time I was sitting in that chair I couldn’t help but think about Chandler. My parents made me brush my teeth growing up, but I wouldn’t say they were real sticklers about it. I don’t think I’m going to go to the other extreme, but I’ll probably talk it up a bit more than my parents did to me. While I lived in their house, my teeth remained clean. I went in for normal check ups and everything was just fine. But as soon as I moved out…well let’s just say it wasn’t a priority.
So at the end of my visit, when I met with Dentist Man and he told me I had to come back in to get one cavity filled, three wisdom teeth pulled, and I need braces, I decided I want to make sure Chandler doesn’t ever let himself get to this place. Then again, when you really think about it one cavity in ten years and 394,200 ounces of Mt. Dew…that’s not bad.
I’m not sure what I’m going to do about the wisdom teeth. I’ll probably worry about them at a later time. I’m definitely going to pass on the braces. Maybe someday Chandler will need braces and then I’ll get them too as a sign of solidarity so he doesn’t feel so bad about it.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a can of Mt. Dew calling my name. While I do that, watch this video message I made for Chandler after my trip to the dentist.
