Anonymous asked: What's the best way to get your son to sit still

Thank you to everyone who submitted a question to “Father Knows Best?” I’ll be getting to your questions soon and posting them as soon as they come up in the rotation.

Hey Anonymous, great question. I will title this answer…

The Stool

When I was in kindergarten I was “a bit of a live one.” Getting me to sit still was more complicated than Tiger Woods’ social agenda.

After only a week in kindergarten my parents received a report from my teacher saying, “Nathan has trouble staying in his seat.” That was a really nice way of saying, “Nathan needs to be hooked me up to an I.V. unit full of Ritalin.” My parents didn’t go the Ritalin route. Instead they used “THE STOOL.”

The stool was…a friggin’ stool in the middle of our living room. Every day I would come home from my half day of kindergarten and sit on the stool until Dad got home from work. 12-5…ish. During this time I could not get up and I could not make a sound. I was 5 feet away from the TV (which I was obsessed with) but I could not turn it on. I wasn’t allowed to have toys with me. I couldn’t do anything. What I could do is sit there. All day long.

At this point in the story there is some discrepancy as to how long this method was used. I remember having to sit on the stool all year long. My parents say it was only for a few weeks. Regardless, it sure did leave a lasting impression.

The next year my mother dropped me off for my first day of 1st grade. Apparently my reputation preceded me because my teacher was prepared as if she was about to be hit by a tornado. So when I calmly walked in by my mom’s side and quietly sat down at my assigned seat, my teacher asked, “Is this the same kid?”

Everyone who’s heard about “THE STOOL” has deemed it cruel and unusual punishment. I really don’t think it’s all that bad. It’s a lot better than pumping me full of meds to sedate me.

I’m still restless at heart, but spending all that time on the stool has taught me to control my energy. Although I do have this small tick where my leg is almost always shaking. I guess ‘restless leg syndrome’ is better than ‘restless entire body syndrome.’