February 2010
63 posts
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January 2010
59 posts
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WatchThis is a pretty fun little video in which we torture my son by shining a laser pointer on a couch and he tries to grab it. Poor guy. He has been working so hard to develop his “grabbing skills” and he thinks he’s getting the hang of it and then we throw this trick at him. For some reason I was really getting a kick out of my son’s confusion. I mean, he has no clue what...
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Were you ready to be a father?
That’s a trick question. No one is ready to be a parent. It’s like going to war. You can train for it. Plan for it. Equip for it. But you’ll never be truly ready.
You might be thinking, “Not me. I was ready.” Really? Were you ready to give up everything? Were you ready to put your old life on the shelf and start a new one? Were you ready to love unconditionally?
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I finally came up with the perfect nickname for...
Having a good nickname is super important. All the really cool people have them. Sean Puffy Combs is P Diddy. Conan O’Brien is Coco. Jay Leno is “The Chin that wouldn’t quit.”
When we first decided on Chandler’s name I was pretty excited about it. My favorite Friend’s character! Maybe my most favorite TV character ever. Pretty cool right? I still think it is...
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Dad, I don't want to be your friend on Facebook
It’s actually pretty naive to think Facebook will still be the cool thing to do when Chandler is a teenager. It’s also foolish to think that Chandler won’t be socially networking on the internets before his age hits double digits. Heck, will the internet as we know it even exist or will there be some sort of amazing new technology wired directly into our brains?
Whatever it is...
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WatchThis video was filmed and edited by my wife Ashley. The first time Ashley and I spent a night together was when Ashley came to keep me company as I pulled an all-nighter in a video editing suite in college. I had my final project due the next morning and was nowhere near done. Ashley and I had been taking an interest in each other but weren’t yet a couple. I really wanted to kiss her that...
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Follow up to Daddy's Day at the Dentist
A few days ago I wrote about my recent trip to the dentist. The next day I received an email from my father. I think I got a lot of my comedic skills from him. I know I got all of my parenting skills from him.
Nice article and video, but sorry about the news from the dentist.
I must say, the description of your childhood dental supervision was fairly accurate. Idon’t recall being as vigilant on...
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My son's cries are lost in translation
In this installment of Father Knows Best I take a question from yet another anonymous asker. What’s with all the secrecy people? Also, don’t forget that you too can ask me a question about fatherhood and I will improvise the answer for you. Click on the link in the first line of this paragraph to submit your question.
Maybe this is a ridiculous question (for all I know, you could be...
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Daddy's Day at the Dentist
The other day I went to the dentist for the first time in…let’s see…oh well at least five years because I know I haven’t been to the dentist since I moved here. And I didn’t go to the dentist at all during my time in college so…it’s been well over a decade. In fact the last time I went to the dentist they gave me a toy afterwards. I was a little...
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The End of Chanuary
Chanuary is almost over and I am sad to say there will be no Chebruary. In just a few short days I will have to untie my drawstring and turn in my sweatpants for a pair of blue jeans and a belt. I’ll have to shave (not really noticeable) and do whatever it is I do that passes for “styling” my hair. I have to go back to work.
I can’t say I’m all that excited about...
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“Chandler, I’m so glad I made you.”
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Chandler 2.0 (beta)
Ladies and Gentleman, I’m very pleased to announce something I know you have all been waiting for. Say hello to Chandler 2.0. That’s right. We have made some significant upgrades to Chandler that I think you are going to really enjoy. And after I demonstrate some of these new features, I promise you are going to want to get your hands on a Chandler today. You might be wondering what...
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“Being a father is sitting in a swim class viewing room and just accepting the...”
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I'm a competitive father
A lot of parents get pretty competitive. Here is a great example from a blog I like: Me Turned Mom. You see it all the time. A bunch of parents sitting around in a music class or watching their kids together from the viewing room of a swim class, and they should be paying attention to their own child but all they can do is look at all the other kids and analyze them. This is why “My kid is...
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My childhood Classic TV Box Set
This installment of “Father Knows Best?” is going to be a fun one. An anonymous submission poses the following question:
Father of Chandler….on your last post you brought up media….question…what shows would you try and get on dvd of your childhood for your son to someday see in case they aren’t aired on regular tv…..for example…I want my daughter to...
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I am the Jack Bauer of parenting
Boop. Beep. The following post happens in real time.
I am the Jack Bauer of parenting. I have my Baby Bjourn straps tucked beneath my jacket covertly like a set of shoulder strap gun holsters. I carry an extra pacifier hidden in an ankle sheath. I can get my son into his car seat in record time and will use excessive force if necessary. And by excessive force I mean I sing to him.
Ahem…I...
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Talking to Chandler about the birds, bees, and...
In this installment of “Father Knows Best?” I will have heart-to-heart talk with Dr. Rod from www.thenormalmale.wordpress.com.
Ok Nate…here goes…you and I are a bit different…you funny…me a tad serious….Have you thought of how you are going to have serious conversations with your son when he is older without comedy? I ask because so many boys are not used...
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“My wife is trying to put Chandler to sleep with out wrapping him up in a swaddle...”
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Swim Class
As I start this post I realize we already have our son going to regular music classes and swimming classes. He’s 4 and half months old. Are we those parents who start filling out registration forms for pre-school years before the child is old enough to attend?
The point of swim class is to get the baby acclimated to water at an early age so that there is never a traumatic swimming...
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Pump up the Jams
In this installment of “Father Knows Best” I’ll answer a question submitted by Sean from Vancouver BC.
Just started following your blog a couple of days ago and so far it seems great. Good work! My partner and I are scheduled to accept delivery of our first baby this May. While she worries about things like health and reading 15 baby books, my area of expertise lies in baby...
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Music Class
Today I had the thrilling honor of accompanying Chandler to his Thursday morning music class at the Lake Oswego Public Library. He has been attending for a few weeks now and he wanted to show me the ropes. This was an enlightening experience to say the least.
The Baby Music Class is a free service provided by the library so parents can learn how to bring music into their children’s lives...
“It’s true what they say, feeding your child really is a bonding...”
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Chandler: De-censored.
This installment of “Father Knows Best?” is going to answer two questions at once. Whoa! Combo deal!
Both questions have a similar theme to them. The first one comes from David Vienna, author of the very funny blog, The DaddyComplex, about being the father of twin boys.
What will be your kid’s first horror movie? And will he watch it with you or watch it on the sly, even though...
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Hey all you lazy parents! Stop holding my child...
I’ve got a beef with a lot you people out there. Usually I’m pretty happy go lucky here. I don’t use my angry voice very much. But I’ve really had it with you people.
Chandler is really close to crawling. He can roll over in his sleep (that’s not just a figure of speech. He sometimes does that) and then he gets up on his hands and knees and he is oh so close to being...
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“My wife is thoroughly creeped out by my son and the fact that he is just sitting...”
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http://www.sirmikeofmitchell.com/imwithcoco/ →
While I have been transformed into a father, I am still a comedian, and I feel the need to spread the word. I’m with Coco.
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Chandler likes to move it, move it.
This installment of “Father Knows Best?” is brought to us by an anonymous question asker who posed this query.
What is Chandler’s least favorite thing?
I have to be honest, Chandler is a bit of an enigma. He can be a tough nut to crack some times. He always seems to have a secret agenda. I’ll set him on my lap and immediately he starts squirming to get somewhere. Where?...
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“As a parent your days are measured in increments of naps.”
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How to get your daughter onto the LPGA Tour
This installment of “Father Knows Best?” is inspired by a question from Criminalminima (check out his awesome photography website!).
What are some things a father should be doing to steer his 2 year old daughter to a career in the LPGA?
Well sir, you pose an interesting question. I myself have a son who is only 4 months old. That is sort of like a 2 year old daughter. And I have an...
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Sorry Chandler, I don't carry quarters
Today’s installment of “Father Knows Best?” comes from a question submitted by Andrewjh.
When my brothers and I were youngsters, when we’d go to restaurants, we’d constantly pester our dad for quarters to play the video games. (Fuddruckers stayed in business because of our Wednesday night visits.) What monetary denomination will Chandler be asking for? Or will...
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“Perk of Parenthood # 143: You can start eating your meal before everyone else...”
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About Singing
Let me start by saying I have no rhythm. I can’t hit a note. If I did hit a note I’d probably break it. I was in band for 7 years and all that time I never once was on the beat. What I’m trying to say is I’m not all that musical.
My wife…also not very musical.
But my wife likes to sing. Me…not so much. It’s not that I don’t like music. I like...
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“Reason # 2,679 I love my son: Right in the middle of a crying fit I turn on the...”
Anonymous asked: What's the best way to get your son to sit still
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What will be the 'Avatar' of Chandler's...
Today I partook in our nation’s new favorite pastime, seeing the movie Avatar. I was pretty excited to see this movie. Actually I was just excited to get out of the house. I had heard a lot of good things about James Cameron’s latest epic, mostly from characters on Fox TV shows. The movie looked to be amazing but I was feeling uncharacteristically cynical about the whole 3D experience....
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Father Knows Best?
Let’s test that theory. In the interest of creating a more open discussion about the trials, tribulations and trivialities of fatherhood I’ve created an “Ask me anything” page. Go to http://www.improvisingfatherhood.com/ask and submit your question. I’ll respond to your question in the form of a post.
Maybe you’re a soon to be dad and want to know on a scale of...
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“I was changing Chandler’s diaper when suddenly I felt a small burst of air on my...”
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Let's Get Digital
It seems these days that everyone has a website. I know that exclamation might sound cliche and a year ago people were saying that all the time. But now more than before I think literally everyone on earth has a website. I saw a Florida license plate today that had “myflorida.com” displayed across the top. I can only assume that site is just a listing of retirement homes and retail...
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“The power in our neighboorhood is out. I just changed a diaper in the dark using...”
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Chandler's First Press Conference
Chandler Smith has just had an amazing day. He spent the entire day driving around with his dad. He was asked to address the press on how he was able to pull off such an amazing victory.
Chandler: Thank you all for coming out today. I know you have a lot of questions but first I'd like to make a statement. I want to start by giving thanks to God. I also want to thank all my loyal fans who believed in me. Okay, I'll open it up to questions.
The Oregonian: Chandler! How did you prepare for the challenge you had today?
Chandler: Good question. I just got back from a 23 hour road trip in a 15 passenger van with 6 adults. After that debacle I feel like I can take on anything.
Willamette Week: Chandler, it seemed like your opponent was really bringing it today. Can you comment on your opponent's performance?
Chandler: Yeah, definitely. Dad was really on fire. When we first got in the car I thought this was going to be a cake walk. But 30 minutes later I was like, "Where the F is this guy going?" He was really in the zone.
The Mercury: Your dad seemed to be pulling some cheap shots. How did that affect your game?
Chandler: Well he took me on three different errands, while I was sleeping, no less. One of those stops was the DMV. But I think we can expect to see a lot more of this type of thing in the future. Of course he didn't feed me for like an hour longer than normal. Is that a cheap shot? Maybe. But look, I can't make excuses. If I complain about his dirty tactics I'm just letting him get to me. I have to rise above.
The Asian Times: Chandler, how are you going to prepare for your next match against your father?
Chandler: Well I plan on bumping my head against things quite a bit...because my dad tends to do that. And I'm taking an online course called "how to break out of car when your dad forgets you." Okay, thank you. I gotta poop.